The story begins here. Last week I felt really happy. It is out of norms actually. Hang out with friends is superbly the most enjoyable moments. I did believe, once you are in the midst of the happy mode something might not be right later on. It is absolutely true. I would say it is undeniable.
The reason is, life is like a roller coaster. There are ups, there are downs. You cannot get what you want at all time. You have to sacrifice something to get something. As I’d heard, if you want to make money you need to spend money. That is karma I guess.
Back to the main story, we go out together. Actually from the night before, we played futsal together. We won the match with 16-15. It is a great feeling to play 70-30 and you won the match. Thus, you just need to pay 30% out of the futsal court rental. Next day, we go out again to do some window shopping. Even though, the name given was window shopping, but there is no window shopping in our vocabulary. It is okay as long as you gain the benefit from what you did. The matter here is, I feel that I was really happy and tired.
At that night, we will have another futsal match. Another great moment where we still play well and I can assume we won the match again. After playing, we went to ‘yam cha’ (not sure what the term is).
Here is the worst moment. Here where I did a silly mistake. Here where I act out of norms. Here where I did action without doing the thinking. Here where I feel bad. Here where I feel guilty. Here where I feel I need to be alone. Here where I felt I had hurt someone. Here, here, here, here ……….
I feel like a loser. You will know how the feeling is when you feel like you are the loser. Suddenly, I knew that I need to rely on someone to deliver my feeling and what I feel. Here what, why, where, when and how friends are. I’m lucky to have such a good friend. Let me name it as ‘L’. L really is a good friend.
For your information, I never express what I feel, why I feel bad to L. When I’m in the midst of instability in term of emotion, L is there to do some advising, to do the comforting, and to do the supporting. I’m proud to have such a good friend like L.
On the next day, we went to our friend’s wedding. Initially, I’m quite reluctant to go. I told L that I’m not ready to go to the wedding. L knows why I don’t want to go I guess. I strengthen my will to go. Along the wedding ceremony, I felt uncomfortable. I just play with the flow. Follow the flow. Then, we went to karaoke. I don’t have the feeling to do the singing. Out of sudden, I just left them there without prior notice.
I really cannot bear at that time. I just left. At night, I went to KL because I’d decided to stay there because I’m working at KLCC. At that particular night, L did ask me why. Why what? Why did I acting such a way? I just be frank, I don’t have the mood and tired perhaps. Actually, that is not the main reason. I think L knows why. Yet, L still does the comforting, supporting, advising and a lot more.
Now I know who my friends are. What are friends for? When we need friends? Why we need friends? How we know friends? After the incident, I more appreciate L then usual. I more appreciate my friends.
Friends, don’t walk behind me,
I may not lead you,
Friends, don’t walk in front of me,
I may not follow you,
Friends, walk beside me,
And be my friend,
Love all of my friends.
p/s: the letter of 'L' is not influence by any.